


Competitive Idiots

by Ramenlover



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: M/M, Two argumentative morons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-06
Updated: 2014-06-06
Packaged: 2018-02-03 16:48:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1751669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ramenlover/pseuds/Ramenlover
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two competitive idiots that cannot concede defeat.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Competitive Idiots

**Author's Note:**

> For my dear Assassin

“Huh.”

Looking up from the mountain of food set before him, Kagami stopped chewing. Mouth still stuffed, he demanded, “What the _hell_ are you doing here?!”

Aomine Daiki raised a sardonic eyebrow, weight shifting onto his back foot. “Tetsu asked me to meet him at this table. So unless you and Tetsu have switched bodies, move.” Seconds ticked past, announced rather inaccurately by the tapping of his fingers against his tray. “You’re not moving,” he noted after about a minute had gone by.

“I always eat here,” Kagami snapped, returning to his food. “Me and Kuroko always eat here. I don’t care what he said, I’m not moving.” He glared stubbornly at Aomine who smirked.

“That settles it then,” almost amusedly, Aomine sighed. With a slight clunk, he dumped his considerably lighter tray onto the table opposite Kagami. Silence fell as the two attempted to outstare each other and continue eating at the same time. (Definitely easier for Kagami as he had more food in grabbing distance.) “This is ridiculous,” Aomine grumbled, finally breaking eye contact to firmly grab a morsel of food. “Stop grinning,” he snapped, pissed off at the triumphant smugness that was plastered across Kagami’s face.

Sniggering, Kagami leaned back, chewing thoughtfully on his burger. “What does that say about you if you can’t even do basic multitasking? Huh? Aomine?”

“I can multitask fine!” Aomine scowled. “I prove that in basketball. This isn’t multitasking, this is blindly grabbing at food.”

A condescending smirk stretched across Kagami’s mouth as Aomine glowered. “You’re just sore that I’m better than you.”

“ _Better_ than _me_?!” Aomine scoffed. “No way. I want a rematch.”

“Fine.” Kagami slammed his wallet on the table to pay for his food. “Name it.”

For several moments, it appeared as though Aomine was actually considering the idea. But then he remembered that he was here to meet Kuroko. It wouldn’t really be fair or sensible to just wander off. As though his thoughts were being read, his mobile chose that exact moment to buzz. Frowning, he pulled it out. It was a text from Testu, speak, or rather _think_ , of the devil.

 _Sorry,_ it read. _Something came up. Can’t make it._

“Alright,” Aomine said, pocketing his phone and pulling out his own wallet. “Who can make the most hoops in a minute.”

Five minutes later, the pair were racing to see who could get to the court first. Skidding to a halt just in front of the hoop, they narrowed their eyes at each other. “Draw,” Aomine eventually concluded before tugging a basketball from his bag.

“You carry one around with you?” Kagami demanded, eyebrows raised. “Seriously?”

Setting it to spin on his index finger, Aomine tilted his head. “You don’t? How would we have done this then? You really are _stupid_.”

“Shut up and shoot!” Kagami yelled, looking down at his watch to time it. “3, 2, 1.”

Smirking, Aomine launched the ball forward into a perfect three pointer. The rebound rocketed towards him. He snatched the ball from the air and shot again. It was a rhythmic, hypnotic display of strength and precision. Half awed, Kagami almost forgot he was supposed to be keeping an eye on the time.

“T-time's up!” Instantly, he cursed himself for stuttering. However beyond a raised eyebrow, Aomine didn’t react, just tossed the ball over.

“Your turn.” That annoying smirk was still in place. It was pissing Kagami off. Scowling, he threw the watch to the taller boy and took his place in front of the hoop. “Try to get at least _half_ my score.”

“I said shut up!”

*

One hour, a stupid amount of rematches and countless arguments later, the pair had run out of basketball related ideas. At that moment they were drawing in the contest neither realised they had started and they were just throwing the ball at each other with steadily increasing force.

“C’mon, idiot,” Aomine called, smacking the ball over. “You think of something. I thought of the last one.”

“Tch, if you’re so smart,” Kagami grumbled hitting it back. “How come you can’t think of two in a row?”

“Isn’t there a carnival or something?” Aomine asked suddenly, throwing the ball from hand to hand. “I think Satsuki was talking about it.”

Annoyed by the change in topic, Kagami folded his arms. “Your point?”

“So there’ll be games and stuff to compete in, _moron_!” Aomine slammed the ball into Kagami’s head. Ignoring the red head’s furious yelling, he shouldered his bag. “Let’s get over there before all of the good games close up.” Teeth gritting in frustrated irritation, Kagami stomped rather ungracefully after him.

There _was_ in fact a carnival, chock-a-block with different stalls and tents. Countless challenges for the rivals to complete.

Their fortes quickly came into play. With anything involving food, Kagami was king. But with tasks that required precise concentration, Aomine was better. When brute strength was needed, however, the boys were fairly evenly matched.

They took it in turns to decide the challenges.

“I bet I can eat more hotdogs than you in a minute.”

“I bet I can shoot more coconuts than you.”

“I bet I can hook more ducks.”

“I bet I can win a bigger toy.”

“I bet I can last longer in the ghost train.”

This last challenge, from Kagami, actually resulted in the two staggering, pale faced and wide eyed out of the purple and black tent with their hearts pounding. “Let’s never do that again,” Aomine hissed. Emphatically, Kagami nodded before looking around for a different challenge.

Neither were sure exactly when this had become more fun than competitive. But it was. Their spiteful arguments had softened into almost playful banter and they took the time to browse the items for sale rather than marching off to the next event.

“Hey, idiot!” Aomine called. “Doesn’t this remind you of Tetsu?” He held up a cuddly blue bird with wide staring eyes.

Pulling a face, Kagami blinked at it. “That makes me uncomfortable. Get rid of it.”

“Nah, I think I might buy it,” Aomine mused. “Maybe I should get its face printed onto my uniform. Then you wouldn’t be able to play me properly.”

“That’s a stupid idea.” Kagami smacked the fluffy blue toy out of his face. “Now choose something to do already.”

“What time is it?” Aomine asked, straying from the topic yet again.

“Eh? Oh, it’s… _crap_!” Kagami glared at his watch as though trying to force it to go back in time with the power of his mind. “I… gotta go.”

“But we’re still drawing,” Aomine complained. Part of him felt a little surprised that he was so disappointed. “We’ll have to carry this on another time.”

“Next week,” Kagami decided. “Same time, same place.”

“You’re on.”

It became a regular thing. Every week, at lunchtime, they would meet at the same table at the same café and spend the afternoon doing increasingly odd challenges in an attempt to outdo each other. Sometimes it was stupid things like doing a handstand on a moving swing or trying to steal a policeman’s hat. Other times it was downright dangerous stuff, like leaning out over scaffolding or hanging from windows. A lot ended in disaster, bruises and a feeling of wasted effort. Others ended with the pair fleeing down alleyways, grinning at each other ecstatically.

Unfortunately, as the months wore on, they began to run out of ideas, till, on one lazy summer’s afternoon, they were lying on the grass of the local park staring at clouds, bored.

“This is boring,” Kagami groaned.

“It was your idea,” Aomine reminded him. “Idiot.”

“I thought clouds are supposed to _look_ like things!” Sitting up, he scowled, folding his arms irritably.

“That one looks like a monster,” Aomine yawned. “Or it could just be a mess of cloudy white cloud stuff. That sounds stupid. Pretend I didn’t say that. Are you even listening?” Eyebrow raised, he glanced up at Kagami who was looking away.

“Hey, what about that?” Kagami asked, pointing at a couple on a bench.

“What?” Aomine frowned. “Cannibalism? That’d definitely be you.” This earned him a punch.

“No! I mean, kissing!” The very word seemed to cause a scowl. “Which one of us do you think is better?”

“I dunno.” Another yawn as Aomine stretched his arms out. “Though I’m pretty sure the only person you’ve ever kissed is that crazy American coach of yours.”

Spluttering, Kagami fumed noisily. “How the _hell_ do you know ab-”

“Tetsu.”

“Dammit!” he growled. “That little-”

“How would we measure it though,” Aomine mused. “It’s not like there’s a kissing efficiency machine or something…” He glanced around and then at Kagami. An idea blossomed at the back of his mind. A very stupid idea.

“I guess we could just ask people,” Kagami sighed. “Not that I’ve really kissed that many… Maybe we should get girlfriends for a bit. Hey! I bet I could get a girlfriend so-”

“No,” Aomine cut him off rather sharply. He did _not_ like where that sentence was going. “I’ve got a better idea.” Smirking slightly, he sat up. “A _much_ better idea.”

“What?” Kagami tilted his head.

“Shut up a second, moron.” Aomine leaned over and kissed him. Shock seemed to hold Kagami in place, his lips frozen and unresponsive under Aomine's. After several moments, he pulled away. “Hmm… I think I won that.”

“Not fair!” Hitting him again, Kagami complained, “I wasn’t ready.”

Eyebrow raised, Aomine leaned back. “Idiot.” Scowling, Kagami grabbed his face and kissed him roughly. This time it was longer, their mouths moved together. Kagami's hands gripped Aomine's arms, nails digging in, as though the other boy would try and escape.

Drawing away, Kagami gave a smirk that was scarily similar to Aomine’s. “I bet I can hold my breath for longer than you.”

“Let’s test that theory.” Eyes gleaming with interest, Aomine pulled Kagami down on top of him. Pleasure thrilling through his brain, Kagami 's hands ran unbidden across the boy beneath him. One tangled in the dark blue hair, the other bunching the thin tank-top in a fist. That little experiment left them both breathless, gasping into each other’s mouths, eyes closed foreheads pressed together.

“Hey, Kagami,” Aomine panted. “I bet I’m better at being a boyfriend than you.”

“In your dreams.”


End file.
